How to masturbate for woman: it is NOT about position

If you search from masturbation or how to have sex … then you will come out with dozens of massage tips here and there. But you may have tried 1, 2 times, but not interested at all?

Or have you started feeling the stimulation, but is there something still missing?

This article is quite long, but extremely important, if you want to quickly learn the movements, you can take a quick look at the last part, but please come back sometime to read the whole article, so that you really understand then to diversify your pleasure more.

First, you need to know your pet’s structure, where are sensitive parts, …

From the outside, you can see your vulva is basically like this.

If your vulva is different in color, big and small lips are not the same as in the picture, that’s okay, you are completely normal. The appearance of the vagina is very diverse. Don’t let the image of some porn stars make you think yours not beautiful.

Large lips contain lots of adipose tissue, protecting the entire internal genitalia. This area does not has as much on nerves as other areas, but you can still stimulate the skin with warm hand, tickling lightly…..

Small lips: this area is very diverse, some people have small thin lips, some have small thick lips and widths, narrow lips. The area is filled with nerves and a greasy gland near vagina opening which create your own natural lubricant for easier sex.

Clitoris (actually, just glans clitoridis) is the structure with size of a pea located at the top of the vulva, where there are 8,000 nerve endings. So the clitoris is a very sensitive point, bringing us pleasure. When stimulated, the clitoris head may swell slightly and erect like a man’s penis.

In addition, the internal structure of the clitoris is a three-pronged Y-letter, with multiple points of contact throughout the female genitals. So in addition to the concepts of A-spot, G-spot, U-spot,….tThere is also a new direction for women’s pleasure journey, which is to create vibrations for the entire clitoris (including the Y forks), which can indirectly and simultaneously affect different positions of the vagina, pelvic floor muscle groups … Therefore, although I will guide you the basic steps to learn your make-love part, but do not limit yourself in these guidelines. Try to actively explore other unique points of interest by yourself.

Internal structure

Currently, we have just known several female erogenous as clitoris, G-spot, A-spot, U-spot, C-spot, nipples …. And certainly in the future there will be many more discovered. So don’t forget to explore yourself.

These erogenous zones are not fixed to all woman, some people prefer this, other prefer that, but these are generally zones that most women can feel stimulation.

Many websites show you how to touch and measure distances to find the zones (like Gspot, Uspot). But in my experience, it is impossible to do so. A spot, G spot U spot is not clearly identifiable parts such as clitoris. Example: G-spot, you will only be able to feel it clearly from other area when it is being stimulated, so it inflate a little, but normally, it is too hard to just define it by finger.

And especially, these eronegous zones are not like electric switch to just touch to turn on. You need massage, explore it and special perseverance for the arousal to be build up. When I first started to masturbate, it took more than 30 minutes, the feeling was like a calm lake surface, sometimes there was a ripple of excitement. But after getting used to it, you will be able to create climaxes and achieve stronger, faster orgasms.

Now, let’s move on to the real steps:


  • Wash your hands, and clean PET (extremely important) (you might want to trim your nails at the first time)
  • 1 bottle of warming lubricant or coconut oil is highly recommended for newbies. It is recommendation just for some first times. When having more experience with sex, more sensitive with stimulation, your body can produce the best lubricant for you quicklier, you might not need use lubricant.
  • Erotic/ sensual videos. Have you ever seen any movies / clips that turn you on?
  • A private and comfortable place, making sure no one unexpectedly knocks on the door. Surely you do not want the situation that after 20 minutes practicing and about to win the prize, the door knocking sound kill your inspiration.
  • And it’s important to be mentally prepared: don’t expect too much in the first place.

Now, let’s start đầu

Starting with outer erogenous zones at beginning might be easier. Due to 70% woman said that they almost get orgasm with clitoris stimulation rather than inner erogenous zone like Gspot.
Apply a little lubricant/ oil on these areas to increase heat, and easy to massage.

Step 1: Massage your breast, nipples. Take deep breaths to increase your focus on the sensual movement.

Step 2: Head down to lower parts.

  • Do you know that 70% of women are much more likely to reach orgasm with external stimulation (clitoris, the slit between outer lips and inner lips), much more than through penetration. Therefore, focus on the outer area first, that is, apply the gel to the area between the outer lips and inner lips.
  • The basic movements are as follows, you should alternate try, because acting too long in one way can make nerves get used, lose sensual.
  • Using 1 finger to massage around clitoris circle, can press firmly, slightly change.
  • Use two fingers to gently pinch the clit or slide next to it gently up, down …
  • Use two fingers to slide between 2 large lips, small lips, massage up and down along from the clitoris to near the vaginal opening.
  • If your finger was tired, take a break and then practice again. Remember it might take you several times of practicing (in a few days), and time up to 30 minutes/ time to get orgasm the first time. So do not be discouraged, the reward will be extremely interesting.

What is an orgasm?

Remember that each person’s feeling of orgasm may not be the same.

For women, there is not always a specific sign like man’s ejaculation (only about 10% of women can squirt because squirtting also need practicing to upgrade to the top, not easily to get immediately).
Some people will see an electric current running through their bodies, some will suddenly feel the sweetness in their tongue, some will tremble and stiffen their legs, some will yell, some can not even make a sound … So, do not force your self moaning like in porn.

However, most still have a few things in common as follows:

When the orgasm come, you can felt immediately that you can not stop whatever movement is going on that bring that feeling, you don’t care anything else beside that. The walls of the vagina will contract sharply for awhile.

When you pass the orgasm, you will see the muscles relax. Depending on how intense your orgasm is, you may not be able to help but lie down and sleep like a baby. However, if you’re still not sleeping, many chances are you can continue to get more orgasms right after.

Not all orgasms are the same, and each time you achieve it, it can open up new steps for you.

Here is my own experience about finding U spot and G spot. When I stimulate the split between outer lips and inner lips, when almost orgasm, I felt the urge to press on a spot within the U spot area, so I found my U-spot. Then another time, when I got used to stimulate and orgasm through the U-spot, I started feeling like I really wanted to put something inside my vagina, want something to stroke a point from inside, and that is when I found my G-spot. Everything comes very naturally, and is a fairly long journey. Searching those spot through measuring like on map didn’t work for me.

Each time, you can find a new erogenous zone, which does not mean that the old zone become boring, each zone bring different orgasm experience. So the whole journey to discover the points is always interesting. You do not have to worry that masturbation will make your requirements higher, difficult to satisfy. The truth is quite the opposite, when I practice masturbating, I can be wet faster, and have much more juice for intercourse with my partner, and also having many orgasm in 1 night.

So try it yourself. ^^

Please share with me how you get your orgasm!

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